Almost Robotic

As I reread my last couple posts, it is so apparent there is much lacking in my life. It has been strictly the facts, as if posting has become a job, an obligation just as many other things in my life. That which is missing is my quiet time, I am longing for my communion with the Lord as it had been in the recent past. The little conversations I have been having with Him as I race through my day are not sufficient.

Life has gotten too busy yet again, the yoke that He so graciously lifted from my neck, I have picked up. I desire to get back to the simplicity of my devotional life with the Lord. I had such a wonderful taste of this freedom and desire to be back in that place.

Please pray for me to endure this season of preparing, that I would not grow weary nor take more on than what the Lord is handing me.

Father, thank You for freeing me up, allowing me to taste of the sweetness of a devoted life with You. Thank You for the hunger it gave me and the longing in my heart to be back at that place. Help me to surrender and trust that all the things I lay down, You will take care of. I pray I would grasp at every opportunity to sit with you, that I would strive to get up early and seek You. I know that it is my time with You in the morning that equips me with all I need to get through the day. I love You, thank You for Your patience and constant pursuit of a deeper, more intimate relationship with me, in so many ways You show me Your indescribable love for me.

I have had the blessing of speaking to two friends over the past week who have experienced Japan and had quite a bit of insight for me. The first was my friend Roy, I have known him and his wife since the week I got saved. These two know my heart for people and the importance I place on relationships, therefore his insight and encouragement really aided in how I pray for the Japanese people and my preparations for going to spend time with them. Unlike the other countries I have visited, the Japanese aren't quick to trust and welcome you into their lives. He said they are incredibly polite, but not necessarily friendly until they learn they can trust you. Once you have built that trust with them, the relationship that is there is of utmost importance to them.

He was able to give me some background into Japanese history as well. Back in 400 AD Buddhism was introduced to this country and it wasn't until the 1700's that Christian Evangelists entered the scene. At this time the government ordered that the borders be locked...no one was allowed in or out. This order was in effect for 200 years, so the Japanese were on this island, without access to any other countries or people for 200 years. This would explain both their desire to protect themselves as well as the care they take for those relationships once they have them.

My other friend, Liz, was able to give me some special insight as well because she was actually working alongside the same people I am going to be with. She showed me some pics of the city, the church and some of the people I will be working with.

As Liz went to Takamatsu for the first time and saw things with fresh eyes, she had quite a different take on things than Barbara and Mike who have been there for quite a long time. She said there is pretty much no one there that speaks English other than the missionaries, she said that there isn't any diversity in this city, therefore, people will notice me and more times than not, stop and stare, foreigners are rare. But she did say the same as Roy, in that they are unable to leave a visitor without their needs met, they are so helpful and polite.

I was asked to send a pic to Japan along with some other papers they needed. As I was looking for one to send, I came across this one...they might change their minds about my teaching their classes. I have heard they are very conservative where I am going...maybe this one should just stay under wraps :)

Lesson from an ant

Last night I was blessed to hear a sermon given by a pastor from Nairobi. He taught from Proverbs 6:6-8 "Go to the ant, you sluggard! Consider her ways and be wise, which, having no captain, overseer or ruler, provides her supplies in the summer, and gathers her food in the harvest."

I have read this scripture several times, but never studied it. These little ants have quite a bit to teach us:

They are never sitting still, they are always moving. They can not accomplish anything on their own, they are always working together. Pastor Tom did some research on these little guys so that we can really consider them: Their colonies go 50 km into the earth (I believe he said that translates into 39 miles). They have 2 stomachs, one is used to store up for their own nourishment and the other is used for sharing. Their life expectancy is 45 to 60 days and they get so much accomplished in that short time.

We only have this day to do all we can do with it, what are we doing to prepare the generations of tomorrow? What are we leaving behind for them? What plans have I made for my daily walk? What am I doing to encourage another and aid them down this narrow path? Too often, not enough is my answer, and the days go by with much time wasted.

Ecclesiates 9:10 Whatever your hand finds to do; do it with your might; for there is no work or device or knowledge or wisdom in the grave where you are going.

Proverbs 31 also has much to say about being diligent in every area, caring for your family and those around you, as well as the needy.

Father, thank You for Your word. For giving us the Holy Spirit to give us insight. For giving us pastors to teach us. Thank You for allowing us to be Your ambassadors. I pray that we would not take this role lightly. Father, I pray that your church would come together. That we would be busy about your work, not wasting a minute, allowing the enemy to steal from us a second of the plans You have prepared. I pray that we would be quick to come alongside and encourage the brethren you have placed in our lives. Father, remove us from our flesh that we may serve you every moment of our days. I know that You will give us the strength and it will be to your glory. The time You have given us is so short, Father, help us to not waste a moment. Open our eyes to see the hearts of those that are lost, give us obedience to share Your love with them. Help us to prepare the way for the next generation, there is much work to be done.

The Lord continues to confirm my trip and preparations for Japan. Just about every person I have spoken with is either heading there themselves, knows somebody there, has family there or are from there, it is really bazarre. Last weekend I was sharing with a friend who attends another church and come to find out, her home fellowship has been praying for me. They have "adopted" the Grays and in their last e-mail they asked for prayer for a young lady named Rebecca who was coming to serve with them this summer. My friend had no idea that I was the Rebekah she was praying for until I shared with her. How awesome is it to know that we are being prayed for by people we don't even know, or we are unaware of their knowledge of our need. It brought a new depth of comfort and joy to me.

I have been asked to keep Dan and Laura in my prayers, they are the missionaries I will be relieving so they can return to the states. Laura is not doing too well, she really needs to return home. Please pray for the Lord to comfort her, for His healing hand upon her. Please also pray for her to receive His wisdom into the things going on in her body. Also, for His provision and guidance for their preparations to return to the states and all the details surrounding their time here.

Please continue to pray for me, especially in regards to my thoughts. So many are sharing their feelings with me whether it is out of excitement and where this could possibly lead (full time missions) or out of their fears. I am a planner, anyone who knows me fairly well knows that my mind has already spanned all the possibilities of where this could lead. I know well enough not to look into the things that can set fear in my heart, but the enemy would love to break me down and plant a root of fear in me. I desire to go without expectations, just hope in my Lord and His incredible plans for my time there.

What a week! Praise the Lord for sustaining us through a very long and hectic week at the office. Praise Him also for His incredible timing and provisions. To sum it up, this week my lead employee was out 2 of her 4 days, she then let me know that she was cutting her hours by 10-12 per week, our copier/printer and our backup both broke this week, we had an upgrade for our billing/scheduling software and all of the preparations for our taxes were due this week. Needless to say we didn't get much training done.

God's way of showing me yet again how important it is to get some of the work off of my desk so that I can do what I have been hired for...manage this place. What a lesson I am learning, He is definitley stretching me.

We have been able to see His provisions so clearly this week, so many things that the Lord had put on both the doc's heart and mine to get in order and we were given that final nudge, and everything we needed was right there ready for us. I can look back and see how He was carrying me through each day this week, even though it was so hectic, neither the doc or I felt anxious. The office as a whole could feel and see His hand on us.

Things are moving forward here for my trip to Japan. My ticket is purchased and my departure date is May 3rd. We have 10 weeks to get things in order here, it seems like such a long time to me, but the ladies in the office are still pretty concerned about my time away. Please keep them in your prayers. We started having weekly meetings two weeks ago so we have a time to address their fears, training process, and give them all a time together to discuss things that will aid in this whole process. I feel that so far the meetings have been fruitful and when we have had the opportunity to train they are picking things up pretty quickly.

In the next week or so, I should receive my teaching schedule for my time in Japan, it sounds like it is going to be a lot, but Mike and Barbara are confident that I will be able to handle it. For those of you who have been concerned about immunizations, I have finally checked into this and I am not in need of any :) I learned that I do need to get an international driver's license which I am told can be obtained pretty easily through AAA.

Sorry this sounds so businesslike...life has been incredibly busy, absolutely crazy to tell you the truth...but I wanted to get an update out to all that are checking up on me here. Thank you for all your prayers and encouragement, I am very grateful.

The Lord has been showing me the need to be present in mind and heart as I have been looking a lot to the months ahead, to the time for my departure. It seems like it is so far away, but there is a lot to be done here in Richmond. Please pray for me to be in this moment as I prepare for my time in Japan.

Please be in prayer for the body as a whole, both here and abroad. The Lord has allowed me to see the brokeness within the body, the unbelief that is causing many to remain in this state. This causes a hindering in the work that the Lord desires to do through and in the brethren.

As the Lord has shown Himself faithful to heal me, my heart's cry has been to be used by Him in leading others to Jehovah-rapha, our Great Physician. I can see how so many are bound by their pain that they can't walk out what their heart's desire is. They can not fully see the Lord's character due to the pain, anger, unforgiveness, unbelief, pride, self-reliance, etc. These are all areas of sin and the bonds of these need to be broken.

Prayer for the church:

That we would be quick to forgive, that we would not allow a root of bitterness to grow in our hearts.
That if we have hurt someone, that we would seek their forgiveness and not allow for any condemnation to penetrate our minds. Pray for those that have hurt you that they would not be condemned either.
As we see God calling people out to other churches, cities, ministries, countries, that we would be quick to encourage despite our lack of understanding, be in prayer for them. God has a different call for each of our lives, we will not always understand.
That there would be confidence in God's ability, knowing that He speaks to each of His children, that He guides our steps, that we would not try to take the place of the Holy Spirit in anyone's life.
For grace and mercy, lovingkindness toward our brethren...the narrow path is not an easy one, we are not infallible.